There’s no excuse for not sounding charming and hilarious over text. Limiting your conversations to lots of “haha!” and “cool” will lead her to believe that either you’re too lazy or just not funny—and that’s when your chances of scoring plummet. So throw out a line from Wedding Crashers or send a picture of Beauty and the Beast (“Us?”)—seriously, anything. Leave the simple texts for your mom.
What I started to do was just put my phone on silent and leave it on my charger, upside down. This way, it would charge, it would be on, and I would get the text message. However, I wouldn’t check my phone on any regular basis; instead, I’d just leave it in my room and go and do something else. This got it out of sight and out of mind for me so that I could focus my time on something more fun or productive.
Instead of the first message, perhaps make a reference to your first meeting. Maybe something like “Those whiskey sours at the bar were so good, weren’t they? Looking forward to having drinks soon” – that is if you both happened to be drinking whiskey sours when you met, but the point is to make a reference to where you met/something you were doing in common, but make it brief…you don’t want to go too into details and come across as stalkerish!
An oversimplified scenario goes like this: Your spouse strikes up an opposite-sex friendship with a person at work, spin or yoga class, the gym, or through your child's school or extra-curricular activities. For some reason, they feel compelled to exchange phone numbers. There's no real need for this, although your spouse tells you that they need to stay in touch because of work or to coordinate fitness class, the kids activities, etc.
Could there please be a blog post on how to apply the principles of being feminine and high value to a long term live-in relationship? I love this blog, and it’s helped me so much (thanks Kat!), I just haven’t seen much on this topic and would love to learn more (I also am pretty broke right now, so reading the blog is all I can afford at this time, even though I have bought the book).
Another important thing a text like this does is to make you seem like the one in control, not her. You show her that you’re strong enough to say something as challenging as this, stand by it, and put the ball back in her court to react to it. Finally, a text like this will most likely make her laugh. When she reads it and sees what an outlandish statement it is, she’ll probably laugh a little. It’s a funny line, and one she probably wouldn’t get too often from guys. (If she’s more of an uptight woman, go ahead and throw a “smiley face” or a “lol” at the end of it. You can also interchange the word “diddler” with any other noun of your liking—anything that you feel would be funny and challenging at the same time. I like this particular word because it really isn’t all that offending and blatantly comes across as a joke rather than something a little harsher that she might take the wrong way.)
After you’ve gotten a woman’s number, the game really just begins. When figuring out what to text a girl you must keep the same principles of attraction and good game in your text messages. Some guys think that, because they have the number, they can easily set up a date and then just end up sleeping with a woman, but it doesn’t work that way. You still have to use all of your other skills and keep her attracted to you, or she’ll completely lose interest and stop answering you and maybe even not show up.
But as this is the point where she did not get back to you and you decided to call (good decision, he gets a courage point). So what about this: Come up (instead of saying that you have been so busy) with a plan. (Think of the mammoth theory) – We LOVE men with plans. You could suggest to do some cool cultural or sportive or whatever thing, maybe you say you have tickets for something and would love to go with her. I think you make yourself more interesting like this. Theater, a cool party, indoor-climbing, black light Mini-Golf…whatever. (If you have talked to her you might have understood if she is sportive or culturally interested.) Generally girls don’t want to date “idiots” (whatever this means as a definition) so if you suggest to go to a museum (there are cool museums as well) or to some event like a vernissage or photographic exhibition she might think: “Uh, he has interesting hobbies and he wants to share this with me" (on top you will have this unforgettable first date and lots of stuff to talk about automatically – just don’t play paintball with her or other aggressive stuff – and if you do at least don’t laugh if you hit her).
I’d recommend not to wait to long to text the first time, either. Generally there is also nothing wrong about picking up the phone and just call! Seriously. We like guys with guts, texting all the time is – sorry – girlish – and this article shows you are over-strained with it 😉 – as first mover you chose your terrain, move where you feel comfortable. Be present, be there, show up, expose, we like to hear your voices.
First of all, as a girl, I feel that this may be rather accurate advice, since I know many girls who actually respond positively to these things. However, keep in mind that not all girls will have the same reaction. I myself am an example. Maybe it is conservative of me, but naughty texts are an outright no unless you are certain she likes you already. I also don’t have a preference towards pet names– stick to my name, or my gamer tag please. However, I do agree on being interested in her life. We’re narcisstic beings, we love talking about ourselves. Be empathetic, and don’t shorten your words. Be sweet and caring, but not too mushy, since it can be a turn off. Don’t try ti act too cute either, because that makes girls like me cringe. I don’t know how many girls have the same attitude towards things like this as I do, but I do hope that my wall of text may help some of you guys. Try them out if thr article doesn’????t work for you. I wish you all the best of luck!
HI Justin i’m new to seeing your stuff. i agree with you but i tried some things you’ve said that i tried for Online Dating.and nothing happens! i get NO response. Women only View me. i found something that had a affect. if a Woman removes her photo and it’s just a silhouette i say Sorry was it something i said? Holds*Head in Shame Lol* and the photo pops up or i say i see you looked at my profile and didn’t respond, was it my Brad Pitt looks or was it my soulful eye’s and this Woman was in my Inbox with the Heart showing love. i get NO responses but if i say the one about Brad Pitt that seems to have a affect. what is it that get’s A Woman to respond, on a Dating Site? i do a lot of research on what get’s A response. i see some good tips but the Women don’t respond, i like what you wrote. it seems that what Advice is being given does not work. or only so far. any Advice for a positive, outcome. i look forward to your message. Sincerely Dana!
When you send a blank text message and get an instant reply to it from the married woman, then it means she is definitely interested in you and wants to know you more. She may reply back with something like a ‘?’ or ‘Hey, did you send this to me by mistake?’ A blank text will give you an opportunity to initiate and shape the conversation, according to your desires and wishes.
Hey guys I’m hoping someone can help me out with the situation I’m in, I met this girl one night and we went back to her place stayed up for hours talking and in the morning I grabbed her number. Me and her are both 25 and she has a five-year-old daughter she works night shift and having a kid I understand she’s really busy. so I texted her in the evening and she keeps the messages short. I feel we had a good initial connection and if there is such thing as love at first sight this would be it 🙂 I haven’t text her for a couple days now, any advice that people can give me would be appreciated
So i met a girl at a party and she gave me her number, i texted her the next day and eventually worked up the courage to ask her on a date, although she said yes it seemed almost like she wasnt too interested because she says she works all the time..but i get a different vibe, but at the same time she asks when shes going to see me, i cant read her too well, what are some techniques to try when texting her to see if she actually is or is not interested?
That’s right, don’t toss it out completely. Like I said, she might just be under the weather, having a bad day, still getting over a recent break-up, or be completely stressed and busy with work. Stop your attempts for maybe a week or two and then retry again. A lot of the time this reattempt works perfectly and you can pick-up right where you left off.
I’d shoot some hoops, work on business, eat food, work out, play pool, listen to music, write, watch a good television show, listen to a quick self-hypnosis session, or take a shower—anything I would have been doing if I weren’t busy texting! Any of these activities took my mind off what she might be thinking or doing, and I could actually be productive with my time.
I soon started setting aside periods of time throughout the day where I would just put my phone down for a couple of hours, whether or not I was in the midst of talking to a woman, just to give myself a rest from it. If someone called or texted me, I wouldn’t know, so I wouldn’t care. I’d simply check my phone later on for missed calls or messages, when I was ready to have it at hand again.
Presumably, you’ll text her within a few hours as you really don’t want to wait too long here. Even if she didn’t respond to your first text with your name in it (because that was just your way of giving your number to her and familiarizes you more), you want to say something like, “Hey Katie, it was great to meet you today, can’t wait to grab a drink with you soon :)” Or, “Hey sweetheart, I had fun meeting you today, soooo can’t wait to go rollerblading tomorrow!”
Text messages can give you an opportunity to know the married woman better. Therefore, do not just flirt with her via the messages, but also try to gain as much information as possible regarding her interests, her likes, dislikes and so on. If she did not turn up for the usual morning walk, ask her if she is unwell. She will feel that you care for her, even from a distance. Makes a huge plus.
What in the case when it is a long time kind of a friend, and you sent her a long well composed letter in email, in a nice manner but dealing with the relationship between the two of you- so kind of a “though” issue for a guy, and you kindly asked the person to take her time thinking, but you definitely expect a reply/reaction. She did not reply in over 2 weeks, and she has a history of trying to avoid confrontation esp on emotional matters, however the contact was generally nice, and on practical issues she always replied messages?
There are different ways of communicating your value through text. The timing and spelling are two ways to do it, but there are also other ways. For instance, you always want to appear as if you’re doing something. So instead of saying things like, “I am just bored, so I figured I’d give you a buzz,” say something like, “I just got home after a crazy and busy day at the office. So happy I finally got a minute to relax. What’s new with you?” Something like this tells a woman you’re a busy guy who works hard and has other priorities in his life. You’ve also asked her what’s new with her, which opens the door for a chat.
I always text my girl that I hope I’m in her dreams and she always ends up dreaming about us and it makes her love me even more. She told me that I had some sort of power over her dreams that I could make her dream about me and dream about us. I was kind of shocked too but then I tried to do it on myself, like you know, wish myself a dream where we both were together and I dreamed of her. I actually did and it was amazing. I did it every single night and she was right, I had some sort of power over dreams. I tested my power out on her again. I told her that she would be dreaming of us fucking as a joke but she really did! She called me up and said she wanted me. LOL