Presumably, you’ll text her within a few hours as you really don’t want to wait too long here. Even if she didn’t respond to your first text with your name in it (because that was just your way of giving your number to her and familiarizes you more), you want to say something like, “Hey Katie, it was great to meet you today, can’t wait to grab a drink with you soon :)” Or, “Hey sweetheart, I had fun meeting you today, soooo can’t wait to go rollerblading tomorrow!”
After getting a quick conversation going, you then want to see what time she might be available during the week so that you can figure out a time to get together. The best way I’ve found to do this, without coming across as weak, is to say something like, “Hey, I’m a little busy today and tomorrow, but I have a few days off after that, so I’m sure we can figure out a day to get together.” Or maybe this: “Yeah, I am booked during the weekend, but I have the next few days off. What’s your schedule like? I’m thinking we get together ASAP :)”
Before I found this website I was texting this girl and I was using step #12 like sending kissy faces to her when I told her goodnight and she sent them back. So If anyone was wondering some girls do like that. Actually most. But everytime I text her she takes a long time to reply. I have even heard some of her friends say she takes a long time to reply to them too. Idk what to do or why she does it.
Always saying “I was so busy but found that minute now to write to you” – personally scares me off. It’s snobbish. It makes me think: “Well we are in the hot phase – and the guy does not really make me feel like I am sooo important: first work, second gym, third friends – I can imagine where this will lead to and how I will feel like in a couple of months…not good.
This can be done if she has canceled plans or just doesn’t seem to want to make any real plans with you. It can also be used instead of the voice mail a few weeks after the non-reply on the two texts you sent her. It can even be used a few weeks after the voice mail, which is a few more weeks after the non-answer of texts. If she doesn’t answer this, it’s over.
Take note of how long your conversations last. If they're long, maybe even lasting a few hours, then there's a chance she likes you! If you think she's putting just as much effort into continuing the conversation as you are, that's also a good sign. Don't forget to take a break on always texting her first. If she texts you after a few days, then it could mean she longs for you to talk to her or she's thinking of you. If you can, see how much she texts or how much she usually texts other friends and see if you're special to her. Try to let her know that you text her more than other people if you can; it will make her feel special!
I would say that yes, it’s likely normal considering you pointed out that even though she is fluent in English, she isn’t well written. Perhaps she realizes this about herself and texting is a source of insecurity for her. If that is the case, I can assure you that she is spending more time analyzing her OWN behavior and response than she is thinking about how much time has passed since she responded. Secondly, how do you handle it? You don’t. Be patient with her. She’ll respond when she can. If you feel texting is really getting in the way of healthy communication, you do have her phone number and she indeed has a phone – pick it up and call her. A lot easier and much less confusing for everyone involved.
HI Justin that was a great article. most say all this stuff leading up to things and never giver the answer, you tell it all. so i know Online Dating is a bit different. and a hole other monster. but how does this apply to Online and how do you go about Online? i see you mention the longer you wait to get back to her the better it is for you. one time i did what you said and i was in the middle of typing A Woman trying to get that sent off. it said A Woman wants to Chat that i was trying to connect with then 15 minutes later or so she views me. when i finally went to her profile she was gone. she closed her account or deactivated it. it seems some Woman want you to reply right away.. i know every Woman is different. so how do you go about this and get great results? i have A Woman i’m connecting with..
I’d recommend not to wait to long to text the first time, either. Generally there is also nothing wrong about picking up the phone and just call! Seriously. We like guys with guts, texting all the time is – sorry – girlish – and this article shows you are over-strained with it 😉 – as first mover you chose your terrain, move where you feel comfortable. Be present, be there, show up, expose, we like to hear your voices.
But as this is the point where she did not get back to you and you decided to call (good decision, he gets a courage point). So what about this: Come up (instead of saying that you have been so busy) with a plan. (Think of the mammoth theory) – We LOVE men with plans. You could suggest to do some cool cultural or sportive or whatever thing, maybe you say you have tickets for something and would love to go with her. I think you make yourself more interesting like this. Theater, a cool party, indoor-climbing, black light Mini-Golf…whatever. (If you have talked to her you might have understood if she is sportive or culturally interested.) Generally girls don’t want to date “idiots” (whatever this means as a definition) so if you suggest to go to a museum (there are cool museums as well) or to some event like a vernissage or photographic exhibition she might think: “Uh, he has interesting hobbies and he wants to share this with me" (on top you will have this unforgettable first date and lots of stuff to talk about automatically – just don’t play paintball with her or other aggressive stuff – and if you do at least don’t laugh if you hit her).
Men seem to think they have to be interesting and cool all the time. This is defiantly not true. Of course we want a man, who is interesting and cool – cool with the others, not with us! Have you ever wondered why in fairy-tales princes have to do all the stuff like fighting dragons to get to a princess? Because she is worth it! So if right from the start you show us, we are not worth a thing, then where’s the point of getting to know you? Sorry, but you will never get a really cool girl-friend like that, but just some poor girl with no self-esteem. Again: what are you looking for? A desperate girl or a partner?
Lol hahaha I have to laugh I’ve accidentally did all these things way before I saw this and so far so good she’s said she loves me and I love her not much to say decides be cute while texting her hell ask for a picture every now and then and draw her as an animal or something and compliment her after you ask for picture with a cute TXT such as “i wanna see your pretty face” everything should go fine but be yourself apparently girls love it when I do
Honestly this really works, I agree with what Antonio is saying ???????????? you can’t just use this on ANY GIRL. You have to see that she is interested in you first,cuz otherwise ur jst waisting ur time,effort nd most importantly your attention on her nd also age matters so don’t try this if you anywhere below 16. A good way u can find that out is to wait for he to reply to your txt NO MATTER HOW LONG IT MAY TAKE(yes I kno it may sound like torture but that’s what you gotta do) this will let u kno how much she really cares about you so you can know how to approach her, either as jst a friend or to keep trying.
Very good point. I’d even add that “how r u, I want 2 meet u” does not vex me because I think it’s a childish way but because the guy shows me I am not worth for him to take the time to write “you”. I admit it’s creepy but generally if someone who is not a real friend writes to me at the end of a text LG instead on “Liebe Grüße” (German for kind regard) I think this person is lazy and does not really care about me (and each time I wonder: why do I think this? But I do!).
Even though flirting is a big part of dating, it’s often easier said than done. Will you say the wrong thing? Will you come off as cheesy? Will they misinterpret your motives? And flirting over text message can be even harder, considering your crush can’t hear your tone or see your facial expression. But there are actually a lot of positives to flirting over text. For starters, you can take your time to say the perfect thing. And the barrier may actually allow you to open up more than you would in person.