Abbreviations show a clear lack of effort, say Debra Goldstein and Olivia Baniuszewicz, digital dating experts and co-authors of Flirtexting. “Texting is a casual platform, but you still have to be somewhat buttoned up.” So spelling at the level of a 7th grader neither charms nor entertains—unless you send, “Sup, u out?” This gem evokes laughter from all women—just at you, not with you. Eli Manning’s SNL sketch sums it up.

When figuring out what to text a girl it can be tough to take your time texting a woman, especially when you’re really interested in her, and it seems counter-intuitive to think that by waiting (and potentially making her upset) you’re actually making her more interested in you. But it works. If she flips the script and takes forever to get back to you, and you (like I do) get anxious waiting for her reply, just put down your phone and do something fun.

In her texts, Patterson recapped all of the highs and lows she had gone through over the past four years without her father by her side. She talked about how she beat cancer and has been taking better care of herself like she promised her father she would. She talked about how she finished college and graduated with honors and how she’d fallen in love and had her heart broken, “(you would have killed him),” she told her father.

Hey guys, im kinda havin the same problem with this girl I really like. I took her to homecoming and I’ve been trying to meet up to hang out or just chill and im not looking for anything serious, but I feel like she’s just another pretty face who doesn’t want to do anything. How do I make the right connection with this girl and have a good relationship with her?

Gah it doesn’t work on this girl, I did everything here, and I did it before even looking for this site, still she doesn’t seem that interested even tho we have a lot of things in common, both hobbies and personality. And I don’t think she is out of my league lol cuz she isn’t exactly megan fox…. she said she is too busy, and can only talk once a week from now on.. now I have to sit here just waiting…waiting…waiting… waiting.. and I dunno if she just said shes busy to get rid of me 🙂


Choosing your words carefully, you ask your partner who he or she is texting. If you already know who it is, you might tell your partner that you are concerned or feeling second-place. Or perhaps you wait until your partner is in the shower and give in to the urge to scroll through his or her phone. Either way, you hear or see something that makes your stomach sink.
What I started to do was just put my phone on silent and leave it on my charger, upside down. This way, it would charge, it would be on, and I would get the text message. However, I wouldn’t check my phone on any regular basis; instead, I’d just leave it in my room and go and do something else. This got it out of sight and out of mind for me so that I could focus my time on something more fun or productive.
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The only thing worse than the head-slamming hangover resulting from your Saturday night blackout is the pang of horror that hits you when recollecting the texts you sent the night before. Whichever disastrous message outcome came from combining mistakes ten (wazup wher chi at) and three (send me a pic of that ass), chances are she can no longer take you seriously—or thinks you’re a pig.
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Really before even thinking about what to text a girl, timing is perhaps the most import part of any good text game. Timing is the space in between texts that you and she take to reply back to each other’s messages. Most high-status or quality girls have a lot going on in their lives; therefore, they tend to be busy a lot of the time and tend to take longer to reply back to your texts. (It’s either this, or they just want to appear busy and will take their time in replying.)
It’s like going to a professional job interview dressed in a tank-top and gym shorts. You come across as totally beneath her and look like a complete fool. Instead, if you’re talking to an intelligent woman, mirror her intelligence. Show her that you’re just as smart as she is by spelling words correctly and speaking with a good level of sophistication. Don’t try to be pedantic, but be her equal. Speak like her intellectual equivalent. Spell all of your words correctly, and follow good English grammar laws.

My only remark: I’d personally not wish to hear that he is soooo busy and has been too busy to call me before (see above – oh, this might be the reason why I have not answered your texts 😉) but I understand the intention to be not romantic but “laid back”, if I’d walk in your shoes. But from a girl’s perspective: you want to be laid back… why again? Because you feel like an idiot if she says no? And then you can say “Oh I really was not interested and just called because I was bored”. (?) No, really I personally don’t get it. From my experience guys who really dare, expose and are courageous are always appreciated more than these “cool/busy guys” (girls know instinctively if you are REALLY busy or just making it up to seem more interesting 😉 – trust me on this, we have to care for babies – instinct is our job). So don’t be afraid, after all men want sex, OK got it, but girls want sex, too – so what’s the point. It’s OK to ask a date. If she says no she is not worth it since she does not SEE you – another girl will, don’t worry.
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They either try to play this super cool guy, who they really aren’t in person, or they’ll say really over-the-top things, really ballsy things, pretending like they’re that kind of guy. In person, they’re as quiet as a mouse and would never dare repeat any of the things they talked about in text messages. Basically, they’ll talk a big game but in no way at all can they even pretend to back it up in person.
After all, no one knows your marriage or your spouse better than you do. Texting affairs are the gateway to emotional and physical affairs. Of the infidelity cases I've dealt with in the past several years, the vast majority started out as "innocent" texting between opposite-sex friends or acquaintances. You are not over-reacting by insisting that a spouse end a texting relationship that you feel in your heart is undermining your marriage, and you are not over-reacting by treating it as a form of infidelity.

Hi all, I have a girl who’s always been there for me. Shes more than a friend but not girl friend. She says I made her smile. But she’s taking me as a brother. I have feelings for her and when I said it onto her face once, she got pissed and i said that was just to check how she reacts. can anybody give me any suggestion on how to make this girl fall for me? Atleast if I could have sex with her, she will fall for me for sure. Pls help. Urgent. Thanks all.
On the day of the date, you want to shoot her a text, preferably early in the day and long before you’re going to meet up. This ensures you that it’s still on and tells her that you’re still in. She’s most likely doing the same thing that you are: waiting for that text so that you both know for sure that you’re both still in and not going to flake. By doing this, you almost guarantee a no-flake scenario between the two of you.
This example is just that, an example. It’s so much easier to come up with your own as this has no context for a real conversation and would be useless if you tried to duplicate it. Just try to understand the usefulness of “lol” here and there. Like anything else, don’t overdo it. Putting “lol” into every sentence, or even every few sentences, makes you look like a half-assed, not-so-funny, would-be comedian!
I’m telling you right now that, if you do anything resembling this, you will totally creep the woman out. You’ve probably done this before already, thinking that if you didn’t reply to her fast enough, she might lose attraction for you or she might be upset with you because you take too long and that might ruin your chances with her. It’s so common in game.
An oversimplified scenario goes like this: Your spouse strikes up an opposite-sex friendship with a person at work, spin or yoga class, the gym, or through your child's school or extra-curricular activities. For some reason, they feel compelled to exchange phone numbers. There's no real need for this, although your spouse tells you that they need to stay in touch because of work or to coordinate fitness class, the kids activities, etc.
Justin Stenstrom is a nationally-acclaimed life coach, author, entrepreneur, and speaker. He is the Editor-in-Chief of EliteManMagazine.com, the founder of Elite Life Nutrition, and the host of the Elite Man Podcast, where he interviews some of the best self-help experts in the world, including guests like Robert Greene, Grant Cardone, Dr. John Gray, Bas Rutten, Dr. Dale Bredesen, Kevin Harrington and many others. Once anxious, insecure, depressed, and unhappy, Justin’s overcome many of life’s greatest obstacles and loves nothing more than helping others do the same! For a complete bio on Justin click here.

My only remark: I’d personally not wish to hear that he is soooo busy and has been too busy to call me before (see above – oh, this might be the reason why I have not answered your texts 😉) but I understand the intention to be not romantic but “laid back”, if I’d walk in your shoes. But from a girl’s perspective: you want to be laid back… why again? Because you feel like an idiot if she says no? And then you can say “Oh I really was not interested and just called because I was bored”. (?) No, really I personally don’t get it. From my experience guys who really dare, expose and are courageous are always appreciated more than these “cool/busy guys” (girls know instinctively if you are REALLY busy or just making it up to seem more interesting 😉 – trust me on this, we have to care for babies – instinct is our job). So don’t be afraid, after all men want sex, OK got it, but girls want sex, too – so what’s the point. It’s OK to ask a date. If she says no she is not worth it since she does not SEE you – another girl will, don’t worry.


You all seem way too needy. It’s okay though, we all get that sometimes. Work on improving yourself first, before you try and bring another person into your life. Sure, easier said than done and we all sometimes crave the opposite sex. it’s natural. But overthinking and over analyzing every little thing you say, or every little thing she/he says is slowly killing your chances. This is hard to overcome, I, myself am still working on it constantly.
These texts will make her want you more and more. They’re more of the natural timing texts between friends would be. At the same time, they build interest in you because you’re getting back to her as part of your normal day, unlike most guys who’d text her back right away. During this time, she’ll wonder what you’re doing, why you’re not like all those other guys she talks to, and why you aren’t texting her right away. It works great.
I’m not saying not to say edgy, funny, even risqué things through text—in fact, I encourage this. All I’m saying is keep it to the edgy, funny, and risqué things that actually come out of your mouth from time to time. Be willing to say those things again to her in person. It will work out great for you if you can develop a game where you can say gutsy statements through text and then back them up in person.
What in the case when it is a long time kind of a friend, and you sent her a long well composed letter in email, in a nice manner but dealing with the relationship between the two of you- so kind of a “though” issue for a guy, and you kindly asked the person to take her time thinking, but you definitely expect a reply/reaction. She did not reply in over 2 weeks, and she has a history of trying to avoid confrontation esp on emotional matters, however the contact was generally nice, and on practical issues she always replied messages?

After all, no one knows your marriage or your spouse better than you do. Texting affairs are the gateway to emotional and physical affairs. Of the infidelity cases I've dealt with in the past several years, the vast majority started out as "innocent" texting between opposite-sex friends or acquaintances. You are not over-reacting by insisting that a spouse end a texting relationship that you feel in your heart is undermining your marriage, and you are not over-reacting by treating it as a form of infidelity.


Continued inaction or letting the texting continue -- perhaps out of fear of your partner's reaction -- only increases the chances that your partner will begin to see you as a nagging barrier to the exciting and fresh-faced relationship that he or she enjoys via text messages. Texting creates a false sense of intimacy between texters. Within weeks, they may feel that they have formed a deep bond. Too often what begins as a cautious "hi...was thinking of u" turns into "i miss u" and then "can you meet again tomorrow?"
Could there please be a blog post on how to apply the principles of being feminine and high value to a long term live-in relationship? I love this blog, and it’s helped me so much (thanks Kat!), I just haven’t seen much on this topic and would love to learn more (I also am pretty broke right now, so reading the blog is all I can afford at this time, even though I have bought the book).

Another technique you can use if she doesn’t answer the two texts you’ve most likely sent her is to do what they used to do in the olden days—call her! Yes, you heard me correctly. Just pick up your phone, dial her number, and press the little green PHONE icon once. Call her, for Christ’s sake! This should most likely be done approximately a week or two later, after she did not reply back to your two texts.

Español: enviar un mensaje de texto a la chica que te gusta, Português: Mandar Mensagem Para uma Garota Que Você Gosta, Français: envoyer des textos à une fille qui vous plait, Italiano: Scambiare Sms con una Ragazza Che Ti Piace, Deutsch: Einem netten Mädchen eine SMS senden, 中文: 给你喜欢的姑娘发短信, Русский: переписываться с девушкой, которая нравится, Nederlands: Een sms'je sturen aan een meisje dat je leuk vindt, Čeština: Jak si psát s dívkou, která se vám líbí, Bahasa Indonesia: Berkirim Pesan Dengan Wanita yang Disukai, 한국어: 좋아하는 여성한테 문자하는 법, العربية: مراسلة الفتاة التي تعجبك, Tiếng Việt: Nhắn tin cho cô gái bạn thích, ไทย: ส่งข้อความหาสาวที่คุณชอบ, 日本語: 好きな女子にテキストメッセージを送る, Türkçe: Hoşlanılan Kıza Nasıl Mesaj Atılır, हिन्दी: जिस लड़की को चाहते हों उसे टेक्स्ट करें

For a while, you bite your tongue. After all, nobody wants to be "that wife" or "that husband." You look the other way and pretend not to notice or be bothered. You force yourself to not ask who your spouse is texting and not show how worried or hurt you are. You lay awake and stare at your partner's phone, wishing you could look through it but not wanting to cross that line.

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Texting her to meet up with you is pretty straightforward. You want to initiate a conversation before just asking if she wants to hang out with you. You want to text her, get a couple of texts going back and forth, and then text her about meeting up. For the first text with a girl, you want whenever possible to bring back what’s known in the dating world as “callback humor.”
The first thing I will do if she does not answer my text, and I know (just by the way she was texting me before) that she definitely received it by now, is send a text like this, “K sounds good lol” or even one like this, “All right hun that sounds Awesome lol.” Both of these make light of the fact that she didn’t answer you. They are short and sweet. They do not blow it out of proportion that she ignored you. Instead, they make a joke out of it, and they usually work to get a response.
Take note of how long your conversations last. If they're long, maybe even lasting a few hours, then there's a chance she likes you! If you think she's putting just as much effort into continuing the conversation as you are, that's also a good sign. Don't forget to take a break on always texting her first. If she texts you after a few days, then it could mean she longs for you to talk to her or she's thinking of you. If you can, see how much she texts or how much she usually texts other friends and see if you're special to her. Try to let her know that you text her more than other people if you can; it will make her feel special!
Using “lol” is a similar thing I like to do and recommend. It’s basically the same idea as the smiley face and can also be used to lighten the mood. A good “lol” placed in a text message shows a woman you’re making a joke. It’s not literally meant to mean that you’re “laughing out loud,” but it has transformed more into meaning that you’re joking or find something funny. (The same thing could be said for using “haha” as this is interchangeable with “lol.”)
I like a girl, I started conversation, then I helped her for her studies, and for the exchanging material she gave me her no. too. and even through text I’ve started conversation, but she doesn’t reply in full sentances, she is not textually active. and doesn’t chat much. I want to know whether she likes me or not? want to chat her for longer time. take this relationship beyond friendship. what to do please suggest me some workable Ideas… here, thanx.
For example, if you want to tease a girl but not come across as being too serious, you can say something like “Julie! Where the hell have you been? It’s been forever since I’ve seen you :)” A text like this shows her that you’re inquiring about her and would like to know where she’s been lately. At the same time, though, you’re making a bit of a joke about her not being around, so it’s a good way to ask something semi-seriously while at the same time coming across as playful.
This can be done if she has canceled plans or just doesn’t seem to want to make any real plans with you. It can also be used instead of the voice mail a few weeks after the non-reply on the two texts you sent her. It can even be used a few weeks after the voice mail, which is a few more weeks after the non-answer of texts. If she doesn’t answer this, it’s over.
Gah it doesn’t work on this girl, I did everything here, and I did it before even looking for this site, still she doesn’t seem that interested even tho we have a lot of things in common, both hobbies and personality. And I don’t think she is out of my league lol cuz she isn’t exactly megan fox…. she said she is too busy, and can only talk once a week from now on.. now I have to sit here just waiting…waiting…waiting… waiting.. and I dunno if she just said shes busy to get rid of me 🙂
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