But that's not always the case. Suspicions are often warranted. Anger, defensiveness and indignation may be covers for betrayal. Explanations may be just excuses. And all too often, a texting affair steals so much time, energy and emotion from a marriage that a rift forms -- or widens -- between spouses that otherwise would have worked through their marriage troubles.
#6 Keep it short and simple. Try to keep the texts short if you want to keep the conversation going. Your focus is to get her to keep all her attention on you when she’s texting. And to do that, you need to keep the beeping texts going back and forth as soon as you can. Long texts can leave her bored when she’s waiting for you to respond. Or worse, she may occupy herself with the television or do something else that’ll leave her distracted while waiting for your text.
I’d look at my message, make sure it had been sent and had actually gone through. Then I’d check that the phone wasn’t on silent and that the vibrator was on so that I’d know for sure when I did get that text back. And then, several minutes later, I’d go through this whole process again, after having checked my phone several more times and not seeing any new messages.

#6 Keep it short and simple. Try to keep the texts short if you want to keep the conversation going. Your focus is to get her to keep all her attention on you when she’s texting. And to do that, you need to keep the beeping texts going back and forth as soon as you can. Long texts can leave her bored when she’s waiting for you to respond. Or worse, she may occupy herself with the television or do something else that’ll leave her distracted while waiting for your text.

Gobbytown…sex is never the answer. It can backfire. And then you lose a really good friend. Give her time and space. Give her the opportunity to miss you. If you’re always around it can seem like you’re bugging her. put a little distance between you two and see if she misses you… if she doesn’t It should really tell you something and you should stop wasting your time.
Before I found this website I was texting this girl and I was using step #12 like sending kissy faces to her when I told her goodnight and she sent them back. So If anyone was wondering some girls do like that. Actually most. But everytime I text her she takes a long time to reply. I have even heard some of her friends say she takes a long time to reply to them too. Idk what to do or why she does it.

These habits carried over to text messaging, and as more and more adults started texting, some of them followed a lot of the same routines as the younger generation of texters had. They intentionally misspelled words, perhaps as a way of being cool or as a way of fitting into the social norm that was developed by the younger generation of texters. (This, of course, is all just a personal theory of mine; nonetheless, my hope is that this trend ultimately stops.)
So summon your coolest, manliest voice, and dial the phone. Don’t have a fake voice, but have your best one ready when you hear that beep and leave your message, something along the lines of, “Hey, Ashley, I’ve been really busy the last week or so. I’ve been jammed with work and everything else. I’m finally going to have some time off soon! I figured I’d drop you a line and see how you were doing. Talk to you soon. Bye!”
Lol hahaha I have to laugh I’ve accidentally did all these things way before I saw this and so far so good she’s said she loves me and I love her not much to say decides be cute while texting her hell ask for a picture every now and then and draw her as an animal or something and compliment her after you ask for picture with a cute TXT such as “i wanna see your pretty face” everything should go fine but be yourself apparently girls love it when I do
I’d look at my message, make sure it had been sent and had actually gone through. Then I’d check that the phone wasn’t on silent and that the vibrator was on so that I’d know for sure when I did get that text back. And then, several minutes later, I’d go through this whole process again, after having checked my phone several more times and not seeing any new messages.

Could there please be a blog post on how to apply the principles of being feminine and high value to a long term live-in relationship? I love this blog, and it’s helped me so much (thanks Kat!), I just haven’t seen much on this topic and would love to learn more (I also am pretty broke right now, so reading the blog is all I can afford at this time, even though I have bought the book).


I think Albertans have to get over the fact that they just happen to be sitting on top of a commodity which happened to be grossly enriching 20 years ago. At one point, some province was the biggest asbestos producer and they had to get over it (despite Harper's effort to reinvigorate the industry 10 years ago). How's that gold rush in the Klondike working out?
These habits carried over to text messaging, and as more and more adults started texting, some of them followed a lot of the same routines as the younger generation of texters had. They intentionally misspelled words, perhaps as a way of being cool or as a way of fitting into the social norm that was developed by the younger generation of texters. (This, of course, is all just a personal theory of mine; nonetheless, my hope is that this trend ultimately stops.)
HI Justin that was a great article. most say all this stuff leading up to things and never giver the answer, you tell it all. so i know Online Dating is a bit different. and a hole other monster. but how does this apply to Online and how do you go about Online? i see you mention the longer you wait to get back to her the better it is for you. one time i did what you said and i was in the middle of typing A Woman trying to get that sent off. it said A Woman wants to Chat that i was trying to connect with then 15 minutes later or so she views me. when i finally went to her profile she was gone. she closed her account or deactivated it. it seems some Woman want you to reply right away.. i know every Woman is different. so how do you go about this and get great results? i have A Woman i’m connecting with..
So summon your coolest, manliest voice, and dial the phone. Don’t have a fake voice, but have your best one ready when you hear that beep and leave your message, something along the lines of, “Hey, Ashley, I’ve been really busy the last week or so. I’ve been jammed with work and everything else. I’m finally going to have some time off soon! I figured I’d drop you a line and see how you were doing. Talk to you soon. Bye!”
Abbreviations show a clear lack of effort, say Debra Goldstein and Olivia Baniuszewicz, digital dating experts and co-authors of Flirtexting. “Texting is a casual platform, but you still have to be somewhat buttoned up.” So spelling at the level of a 7th grader neither charms nor entertains—unless you send, “Sup, u out?” This gem evokes laughter from all women—just at you, not with you. Eli Manning’s SNL sketch sums it up.
For example, if you want to tease a girl but not come across as being too serious, you can say something like “Julie! Where the hell have you been? It’s been forever since I’ve seen you :)” A text like this shows her that you’re inquiring about her and would like to know where she’s been lately. At the same time, though, you’re making a bit of a joke about her not being around, so it’s a good way to ask something semi-seriously while at the same time coming across as playful.
Always saying “I was so busy but found that minute now to write to you” – personally scares me off. It’s snobbish. It makes me think: “Well we are in the hot phase – and the guy does not really make me feel like I am sooo important: first work, second gym, third friends – I can imagine where this will lead to and how I will feel like in a couple of months…not good.
Another important thing a text like this does is to make you seem like the one in control, not her. You show her that you’re strong enough to say something as challenging as this, stand by it, and put the ball back in her court to react to it. Finally, a text like this will most likely make her laugh. When she reads it and sees what an outlandish statement it is, she’ll probably laugh a little. It’s a funny line, and one she probably wouldn’t get too often from guys. (If she’s more of an uptight woman, go ahead and throw a “smiley face” or a “lol” at the end of it. You can also interchange the word “diddler” with any other noun of your liking—anything that you feel would be funny and challenging at the same time. I like this particular word because it really isn’t all that offending and blatantly comes across as a joke rather than something a little harsher that she might take the wrong way.)
On the day of the date, you want to shoot her a text, preferably early in the day and long before you’re going to meet up. This ensures you that it’s still on and tells her that you’re still in. She’s most likely doing the same thing that you are: waiting for that text so that you both know for sure that you’re both still in and not going to flake. By doing this, you almost guarantee a no-flake scenario between the two of you.

I’m not saying not to say edgy, funny, even risqué things through text—in fact, I encourage this. All I’m saying is keep it to the edgy, funny, and risqué things that actually come out of your mouth from time to time. Be willing to say those things again to her in person. It will work out great for you if you can develop a game where you can say gutsy statements through text and then back them up in person.


The king of all texting fouls, “crack texting” —as Masters defines it—means sending multiple messages without any or equal response. Frequency is the most powerful component in her view of you. Inability to set the pace will make or break your situation. The rules to live by: one text at a time, take your time, and don’t answer her every text. Otherwise, expect her to delete your number.
Another thing you could say is, “Hey, Julie, how are you? Haven’t talked to you in a while, been wicked busy lately, but I’m getting some time off this week and would love to hear from you!” Something like this shows her that you’re busy but again opens the door for her to message you. You always want to seem like you’ve been doing a lot of things but at the same time are messaging her because you’re getting some time off and would like to spend a bit of it with her.

These texts will make her want you more and more. They’re more of the natural timing texts between friends would be. At the same time, they build interest in you because you’re getting back to her as part of your normal day, unlike most guys who’d text her back right away. During this time, she’ll wonder what you’re doing, why you’re not like all those other guys she talks to, and why you aren’t texting her right away. It works great.
Texting her right when you get her number is definitely the best way to make sure that she gave you the correct one. It also gets a message screen of your text popping up on her phone. When she gets this new text-message box, she’ll presumably add your name so that she knows who has texted her. This familiarizes you even more to her and sets up your future texts. She’s more likely to respond to the texts thereafter.
I always text my girl that I hope I’m in her dreams and she always ends up dreaming about us and it makes her love me even more. She told me that I had some sort of power over her dreams that I could make her dream about me and dream about us. I was kind of shocked too but then I tried to do it on myself, like you know, wish myself a dream where we both were together and I dreamed of her. I actually did and it was amazing. I did it every single night and she was right, I had some sort of power over dreams. I tested my power out on her again. I told her that she would be dreaming of us fucking as a joke but she really did! She called me up and said she wanted me. LOL
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