Texting her to meet up with you is pretty straightforward. You want to initiate a conversation before just asking if she wants to hang out with you. You want to text her, get a couple of texts going back and forth, and then text her about meeting up. For the first text with a girl, you want whenever possible to bring back what’s known in the dating world as “callback humor.”
Referring to someone you just met as “hun/sweetheart” seems borderline creepy to me. It’s too superficial. If I received this reference towards me in a text before even a second date, I would not answer, or if I answered I’d let the guy know “thanks but no thanks”. Perhaps that’s just me. Instead, in the first text you can just refer to me by my name. Subsequently, you don’t really need to address me directly, just say “Hey” then continue on with your text. After a couple of successful dates (meaning you were both smiling and/or laughing at times, and both seemed to enjoy the dates) the nicknames and cute references like “sweetheart” will feel more natural and fitting.
They either try to play this super cool guy, who they really aren’t in person, or they’ll say really over-the-top things, really ballsy things, pretending like they’re that kind of guy. In person, they’re as quiet as a mouse and would never dare repeat any of the things they talked about in text messages. Basically, they’ll talk a big game but in no way at all can they even pretend to back it up in person.
HI Justin that was a great article. most say all this stuff leading up to things and never giver the answer, you tell it all. so i know Online Dating is a bit different. and a hole other monster. but how does this apply to Online and how do you go about Online? i see you mention the longer you wait to get back to her the better it is for you. one time i did what you said and i was in the middle of typing A Woman trying to get that sent off. it said A Woman wants to Chat that i was trying to connect with then 15 minutes later or so she views me. when i finally went to her profile she was gone. she closed her account or deactivated it. it seems some Woman want you to reply right away.. i know every Woman is different. so how do you go about this and get great results? i have A Woman i’m connecting with..
A line like this is actually really effective and a lot more intricate than you might think. For one, it challenges the woman in question who’s been ignoring you, to hang out with you and not be a “diddler” like you’re suggesting she is. It also qualifies her, which is huge in game, and makes her want to hang out with you just to prove to you that she’s not what you’re calling her.
okay i just dont know what i am doing wrong. there is this girl and shes a year older than me and me and her have talked on and off but i wanna be something for real with her and i have to get her to fall for me again she goes to the same school as me and always smiles at me in the hallway. i cant tell if shes just being nice but i try to text her and sometimes she does answer so i wait for her to answer and after about 3 hours i try again and i do that one more time sometimes but if she doesnt answer i try the next day. i told her i miss her at night and it worked but now but she barely answers me…. i just dont know how to get her to fall for me
This last text technique has really worked well in the past for me and for my students. Basically, you want to qualify her and call her out in a funny way for not wanting to hang out with you. You can say something like, “What’s up sweetheart? Are you going to hang out this week, or are you going to keep being a Diddler?” Now, before you laugh and say, what a ridiculous thing to say, hear me out.
Even though flirting is a big part of dating, it’s often easier said than done. Will you say the wrong thing? Will you come off as cheesy? Will they misinterpret your motives? And flirting over text message can be even harder, considering your crush can’t hear your tone or see your facial expression. But there are actually a lot of positives to flirting over text. For starters, you can take your time to say the perfect thing. And the barrier may actually allow you to open up more than you would in person.