Abbreviations show a clear lack of effort, say Debra Goldstein and Olivia Baniuszewicz, digital dating experts and co-authors of Flirtexting. “Texting is a casual platform, but you still have to be somewhat buttoned up.” So spelling at the level of a 7th grader neither charms nor entertains—unless you send, “Sup, u out?” This gem evokes laughter from all women—just at you, not with you. Eli Manning’s SNL sketch sums it up.

I’m 14 and I tried this on a girl who I deeply loved. She’s my neighbor too!!! I’m shy of talking to girls I like and try to stay as far away from them as possible. So I got a Facebook when I turned 13 (I would have gotten it earlier but my parents wouldn’t let me) and it automatically downloaded her phone number into my address book on my phone. Jackpot I thought. So I started texting her using these steps and there was no response. So I tried step #12 and I finally got a response. “Keep dreaming, Gabe. Keep dreaming.” So I rate it a 1 out of 1,000,000,000!!!!


Using “lol” is a similar thing I like to do and recommend. It’s basically the same idea as the smiley face and can also be used to lighten the mood. A good “lol” placed in a text message shows a woman you’re making a joke. It’s not literally meant to mean that you’re “laughing out loud,” but it has transformed more into meaning that you’re joking or find something funny. (The same thing could be said for using “haha” as this is interchangeable with “lol.”)
The only thing worse than the head-slamming hangover resulting from your Saturday night blackout is the pang of horror that hits you when recollecting the texts you sent the night before. Whichever disastrous message outcome came from combining mistakes ten (wazup wher chi at) and three (send me a pic of that ass), chances are she can no longer take you seriously—or thinks you’re a pig.
Oky this girl I supper different but then I will try to use this on her. Never liked her 1st but when time passed I started getting felling for her. Tried SMs’s she used to respond but then I stopped so go her on BBM so I’m out of options. I’m a popular kid at school so I think she doesn’t like me coz she thinks I’m a player so please help me out!!!!

The king of all texting fouls, “crack texting” —as Masters defines it—means sending multiple messages without any or equal response. Frequency is the most powerful component in her view of you. Inability to set the pace will make or break your situation. The rules to live by: one text at a time, take your time, and don’t answer her every text. Otherwise, expect her to delete your number.

A lot of these one liners are really good for text messages, but you really need to do a lot more than just a one liner to set yourself apart from the rest. Remember, today’s dating world is fiercely competitive and guys are up against a lot of other guys competing for the same girl all because it’s so convenient to get in touch with one another. Online dating is just making the situation even worse, when anyone with a selfie can sign up and get spammed by hundreds of suitors in a few seconds. Keep these in reserve for after you get to know someone. The funnier ones especially: who doesn’t like to laugh?
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