The only thing worse than the head-slamming hangover resulting from your Saturday night blackout is the pang of horror that hits you when recollecting the texts you sent the night before. Whichever disastrous message outcome came from combining mistakes ten (wazup wher chi at) and three (send me a pic of that ass), chances are she can no longer take you seriously—or thinks you’re a pig.

2) Start using her error to make a fool out of her – most spelling errors are made because she didn´t pretty a key often enough… so she says “rtop” instead of stop, “stnp” instead of stop. Quite often she was trying to type the second or the third letter on the key, didn´t, but didn´t see it… excellent opportunities for playful teasing if you ask me. Some examples:

I’d look at my message, make sure it had been sent and had actually gone through. Then I’d check that the phone wasn’t on silent and that the vibrator was on so that I’d know for sure when I did get that text back. And then, several minutes later, I’d go through this whole process again, after having checked my phone several more times and not seeing any new messages.


Men seem to think they have to be interesting and cool all the time. This is defiantly not true. Of course we want a man, who is interesting and cool – cool with the others, not with us! Have you ever wondered why in fairy-tales princes have to do all the stuff like fighting dragons to get to a princess? Because she is worth it! So if right from the start you show us, we are not worth a thing, then where’s the point of getting to know you? Sorry, but you will never get a really cool girl-friend like that, but just some poor girl with no self-esteem. Again: what are you looking for? A desperate girl or a partner?
They either try to play this super cool guy, who they really aren’t in person, or they’ll say really over-the-top things, really ballsy things, pretending like they’re that kind of guy. In person, they’re as quiet as a mouse and would never dare repeat any of the things they talked about in text messages. Basically, they’ll talk a big game but in no way at all can they even pretend to back it up in person.
A lot of these one liners are really good for text messages, but you really need to do a lot more than just a one liner to set yourself apart from the rest. Remember, today’s dating world is fiercely competitive and guys are up against a lot of other guys competing for the same girl all because it’s so convenient to get in touch with one another. Online dating is just making the situation even worse, when anyone with a selfie can sign up and get spammed by hundreds of suitors in a few seconds. Keep these in reserve for after you get to know someone. The funnier ones especially: who doesn’t like to laugh?
×