I have this crush in this girl and I know she likes me more than a friend but also likes this other guy. I always text her first and start up the conversation. Anyway that I could win her heart instead of the other guy? Also she doesn’t meet up with the guy she likes and mostly has a text relationship. I’m the only guy that actually cuddles with her but she doesn’t realize the other guy won’t do that. PLEASE HELP ME OUT!!
My only remark: I’d personally not wish to hear that he is soooo busy and has been too busy to call me before (see above – oh, this might be the reason why I have not answered your texts 😉) but I understand the intention to be not romantic but “laid back”, if I’d walk in your shoes. But from a girl’s perspective: you want to be laid back… why again? Because you feel like an idiot if she says no? And then you can say “Oh I really was not interested and just called because I was bored”. (?) No, really I personally don’t get it. From my experience guys who really dare, expose and are courageous are always appreciated more than these “cool/busy guys” (girls know instinctively if you are REALLY busy or just making it up to seem more interesting 😉 – trust me on this, we have to care for babies – instinct is our job). So don’t be afraid, after all men want sex, OK got it, but girls want sex, too – so what’s the point. It’s OK to ask a date. If she says no she is not worth it since she does not SEE you – another girl will, don’t worry.
Start with a warm and simple line that feels good to read. It leaves the conversation open and you’ll be able to know if she’s free to chat too. “Hi”, “Hey, what are you doing?” or even just a smiley face should work perfectly to start a conversation and bring a smile on her face. If she’s busy, she’ll tell you or respond when she has the time. There’s no way you can go wrong with that.
You have to understand whom you want to address and why. If you find a real lady she does not want to play games, I assure you. Generally women hate playing games. We don’t want men to fake, to use tricks, to wait a little longer to respond because you think that we think that you think (…you see? This is mental masturbation, it might work but is does not work with grown ups or people with guts, so better forget it. When a man thinks “A” usually a women in the same time thinks “ABC446gSIEHFNI&%ß…” so please be kind and don’t drive us insane with games. Thank you).
#1 Night time is the best time to text a girl. If the girl you like is comfortable with texting late into the night, you’ve already got the edge you need. Start by texting her late in the evening and look for ways to keep the conversation going when she slips into her bed. There’s something so sexy and romantic about a quiet night that’ll only work in your favor. [Read: How to flirt with a girl by behaving like a friend]
Men seem to think they have to be interesting and cool all the time. This is defiantly not true. Of course we want a man, who is interesting and cool – cool with the others, not with us! Have you ever wondered why in fairy-tales princes have to do all the stuff like fighting dragons to get to a princess? Because she is worth it! So if right from the start you show us, we are not worth a thing, then where’s the point of getting to know you? Sorry, but you will never get a really cool girl-friend like that, but just some poor girl with no self-esteem. Again: what are you looking for? A desperate girl or a partner?
I’m telling you right now that, if you do anything resembling this, you will totally creep the woman out. You’ve probably done this before already, thinking that if you didn’t reply to her fast enough, she might lose attraction for you or she might be upset with you because you take too long and that might ruin your chances with her. It’s so common in game.
Lots of people have a misconception and feel that they need relationship counselling only when things get really bad. But no matter what situation you face in your relationship, our counsellors can be of help to you even if your problems seem trivial. It doesn’t matter if you are single, married, living together, gay or straight – we are here to help you. At Bonobology, we have a huge panel of Counselling Psychologists, Couple Therapists, Relationship Psychotherapists, Life Coaches, Relationship Coaches, Sex Relationship Experts, Divorce Lawyers, Sexologists and Psychoanalysts to help you with your relationship problems. Our counsellors assist you in a caring and supportive manner in order to help you find a way through the difficulties you may be facing in your relationship. You can be reassured that your name remains confidential if you want and receive a non-judgemental approach from our counsellors.
An oversimplified scenario goes like this: Your spouse strikes up an opposite-sex friendship with a person at work, spin or yoga class, the gym, or through your child's school or extra-curricular activities. For some reason, they feel compelled to exchange phone numbers. There's no real need for this, although your spouse tells you that they need to stay in touch because of work or to coordinate fitness class, the kids activities, etc.
You have to understand that women are not like this. Women check you out and know usually after 10 minutes (most of the time it takes much less, though) if you interest her or not. If yes, it will be easy for you. If not of course you can awoke her interest (again) – but basically if she did not react/text back it means: (1) she likes you but it is a bad moment (2) she thinks you are not what she wants/needs (right now). So IF you manage to get into the game AGAIN by using a trick or so-called technique, be aware that you must pull out of the hut more than one joke or some semi-offensive provocation. It is true: when a guy is not very attractive for a girl he can still go anywhere with the right mindset. Girls are mental. So generally provocation might work but you are on a stony road there – be prepared.
Fortunately; I came across a fascinating book that explains all of the subtle mechanics of text game with lots of effective examples of exactly what to say to get girls to text you back, come on dates, to get out the friend zone and he gives you great teases that get you to stay on a girls mind, so she’s thinking about you more than she would otherwise.
When the question of what to text a girl comes up, smiley faces are good in my book. I like to use them here and there just to lighten things up with a woman. Some dating coaches wouldn’t recommend doing this, but I disagree. A proper smiley face can put more meaning to something you text. After all, when you send a text, you don’t really have the luxury of fully expressing yourself through voice tone and changes of body language the way you would in person. So sometimes, when you say something she might take as being serious through text, if you just throw in a smiley face at the end, it can completely change the mood of the text.
I’d look at my message, make sure it had been sent and had actually gone through. Then I’d check that the phone wasn’t on silent and that the vibrator was on so that I’d know for sure when I did get that text back. And then, several minutes later, I’d go through this whole process again, after having checked my phone several more times and not seeing any new messages.
A lot of these one liners are really good for text messages, but you really need to do a lot more than just a one liner to set yourself apart from the rest. Remember, today’s dating world is fiercely competitive and guys are up against a lot of other guys competing for the same girl all because it’s so convenient to get in touch with one another. Online dating is just making the situation even worse, when anyone with a selfie can sign up and get spammed by hundreds of suitors in a few seconds. Keep these in reserve for after you get to know someone. The funnier ones especially: who doesn’t like to laugh?