But as this is the point where she did not get back to you and you decided to call (good decision, he gets a courage point). So what about this: Come up (instead of saying that you have been so busy) with a plan. (Think of the mammoth theory) – We LOVE men with plans. You could suggest to do some cool cultural or sportive or whatever thing, maybe you say you have tickets for something and would love to go with her. I think you make yourself more interesting like this. Theater, a cool party, indoor-climbing, black light Mini-Golf…whatever. (If you have talked to her you might have understood if she is sportive or culturally interested.) Generally girls don’t want to date “idiots” (whatever this means as a definition) so if you suggest to go to a museum (there are cool museums as well) or to some event like a vernissage or photographic exhibition she might think: “Uh, he has interesting hobbies and he wants to share this with me" (on top you will have this unforgettable first date and lots of stuff to talk about automatically – just don’t play paintball with her or other aggressive stuff – and if you do at least don’t laugh if you hit her).
Justin Stenstrom is a nationally-acclaimed life coach, author, entrepreneur, and speaker. He is the Editor-in-Chief of EliteManMagazine.com, the founder of Elite Life Nutrition, and the host of the Elite Man Podcast, where he interviews some of the best self-help experts in the world, including guests like Robert Greene, Grant Cardone, Dr. John Gray, Bas Rutten, Dr. Dale Bredesen, Kevin Harrington and many others. Once anxious, insecure, depressed, and unhappy, Justin’s overcome many of life’s greatest obstacles and loves nothing more than helping others do the same! For a complete bio on Justin click here.
For example, if you want to tease a girl but not come across as being too serious, you can say something like “Julie! Where the hell have you been? It’s been forever since I’ve seen you :)” A text like this shows her that you’re inquiring about her and would like to know where she’s been lately. At the same time, though, you’re making a bit of a joke about her not being around, so it’s a good way to ask something semi-seriously while at the same time coming across as playful.
There are different ways of communicating your value through text. The timing and spelling are two ways to do it, but there are also other ways. For instance, you always want to appear as if you’re doing something. So instead of saying things like, “I am just bored, so I figured I’d give you a buzz,” say something like, “I just got home after a crazy and busy day at the office. So happy I finally got a minute to relax. What’s new with you?” Something like this tells a woman you’re a busy guy who works hard and has other priorities in his life. You’ve also asked her what’s new with her, which opens the door for a chat.
Men seem to think they have to be interesting and cool all the time. This is defiantly not true. Of course we want a man, who is interesting and cool – cool with the others, not with us! Have you ever wondered why in fairy-tales princes have to do all the stuff like fighting dragons to get to a princess? Because she is worth it! So if right from the start you show us, we are not worth a thing, then where’s the point of getting to know you? Sorry, but you will never get a really cool girl-friend like that, but just some poor girl with no self-esteem. Again: what are you looking for? A desperate girl or a partner?
Minor things like punctuation are not as important as the spelling itself. If you’re trying to “speak” a certain way and you want to emphasize something, it’s okay to use three or four exclamation points. If she doesn’t use any punctuation at the end of her sentences, then you don’t really have to use it either. It’s not really a factor at all. At the end of the day, it really all comes down to the way she texts and the way you mirror that.
What about this strategy: Be natural. Follow your instinct. If I text a guy and he does not respond fastly a couple of times I start not to respond fastly either as an act of revenge. This is odd but still true. So be available in the beginning (we don’t think you are creepy! We love it!) and if we are not responsive then (and only then) slow down. But don’t come up with patterns and rules – it really does not make sense, sorry. It is a very typical male thinking approach. Women’s brains don’t work like that – at least if they are > 15 years. If you want to play cards of brain usage and stereotypes and giving general gender according advise then man are rational and women are emotional. So no patterns for us. It’s true: mind the dosage – don’t stalk her. But if she is available be yourself.
#6 Keep it short and simple. Try to keep the texts short if you want to keep the conversation going. Your focus is to get her to keep all her attention on you when she’s texting. And to do that, you need to keep the beeping texts going back and forth as soon as you can. Long texts can leave her bored when she’s waiting for you to respond. Or worse, she may occupy herself with the television or do something else that’ll leave her distracted while waiting for your text.
Hi, I appreciate you taking your time in writing this article, but there is one thing I want to critique. Being a girl myself I hate it when guys ignore/don’t read my texts, playing hard to get is fine, but don’t play hard to get over texts. My friend dumped her boyfriend because he ignored her texts for weeks. If you want to wait a while before texting, only wait a day or two. I agree with basically everything else. Good job.
I say loosely followed here because you don’t want to always text her eleven minutes after she texts you if she usually takes about ten minutes to text you. If you develop a pattern of taking the same amount of time to text her every time you respond back, she’ll pick up on this and know that you are literally just waiting to text her. It’s nearly as bad as texting her right away.
Be engaging. Show your girl that you're capable of keeping up a fun conversation over the phone. In turn, she'll think that you can hold up your end of a conversation in person. Your goal in texting the girl you like is giving her just a sliver of your personality and making her want more. If you fascinate the girl, she'll keep wanting to talk to you. Here's how to do it:
Start with a warm and simple line that feels good to read. It leaves the conversation open and you’ll be able to know if she’s free to chat too. “Hi”, “Hey, what are you doing?” or even just a smiley face should work perfectly to start a conversation and bring a smile on her face. If she’s busy, she’ll tell you or respond when she has the time. There’s no way you can go wrong with that.