But as this is the point where she did not get back to you and you decided to call (good decision, he gets a courage point). So what about this: Come up (instead of saying that you have been so busy) with a plan. (Think of the mammoth theory) – We LOVE men with plans. You could suggest to do some cool cultural or sportive or whatever thing, maybe you say you have tickets for something and would love to go with her. I think you make yourself more interesting like this. Theater, a cool party, indoor-climbing, black light Mini-Golf…whatever. (If you have talked to her you might have understood if she is sportive or culturally interested.) Generally girls don’t want to date “idiots” (whatever this means as a definition) so if you suggest to go to a museum (there are cool museums as well) or to some event like a vernissage or photographic exhibition she might think: “Uh, he has interesting hobbies and he wants to share this with me" (on top you will have this unforgettable first date and lots of stuff to talk about automatically – just don’t play paintball with her or other aggressive stuff – and if you do at least don’t laugh if you hit her).
The king of all texting fouls, “crack texting” —as Masters defines it—means sending multiple messages without any or equal response. Frequency is the most powerful component in her view of you. Inability to set the pace will make or break your situation. The rules to live by: one text at a time, take your time, and don’t answer her every text. Otherwise, expect her to delete your number.
Could there please be a blog post on how to apply the principles of being feminine and high value to a long term live-in relationship? I love this blog, and it’s helped me so much (thanks Kat!), I just haven’t seen much on this topic and would love to learn more (I also am pretty broke right now, so reading the blog is all I can afford at this time, even though I have bought the book).
Here's where anything can happen. Your spouse may downplay the relationship and shrug off your concerns, saying "We're just friends. You have to trust me." Or your spouse may react with an angry, inflated display of wounded indignation by saying, "Oh, so I'm not allowed to have ANY friends?" He or she may turn the situation around so that it's you who finds yourself explaining your behaviour. He or she may make you feel paranoid, jealous, controlling, or pathetic. "You went through my phone! You're crazy. That's private!"
#10 But flirt when you get the opportunity. Every now and then, you’d find the perfect opportunity to flirt with her. Wait for that moment and use it to tease her or pull her leg, especially when she makes a compliment about herself or talks about how good she is at doing something. A good excuse to challenge and flirt with her will always work in your favor.
You all seem way too needy. It’s okay though, we all get that sometimes. Work on improving yourself first, before you try and bring another person into your life. Sure, easier said than done and we all sometimes crave the opposite sex. it’s natural. But overthinking and over analyzing every little thing you say, or every little thing she/he says is slowly killing your chances. This is hard to overcome, I, myself am still working on it constantly.

I’d shoot some hoops, work on business, eat food, work out, play pool, listen to music, write, watch a good television show, listen to a quick self-hypnosis session, or take a shower—anything I would have been doing if I weren’t busy texting! Any of these activities took my mind off what she might be thinking or doing, and I could actually be productive with my time.
What about this strategy: Be natural. Follow your instinct. If I text a guy and he does not respond fastly a couple of times I start not to respond fastly either as an act of revenge. This is odd but still true. So be available in the beginning (we don’t think you are creepy! We love it!) and if we are not responsive then (and only then) slow down. But don’t come up with patterns and rules – it really does not make sense, sorry. It is a very typical male thinking approach. Women’s brains don’t work like that – at least if they are > 15 years. If you want to play cards of brain usage and stereotypes and giving general gender according advise then man are rational and women are emotional. So no patterns for us. It’s true: mind the dosage – don’t stalk her. But if she is available be yourself.
But that's not always the case. Suspicions are often warranted. Anger, defensiveness and indignation may be covers for betrayal. Explanations may be just excuses. And all too often, a texting affair steals so much time, energy and emotion from a marriage that a rift forms -- or widens -- between spouses that otherwise would have worked through their marriage troubles.
Another thing you could say is, “Hey, Julie, how are you? Haven’t talked to you in a while, been wicked busy lately, but I’m getting some time off this week and would love to hear from you!” Something like this shows her that you’re busy but again opens the door for her to message you. You always want to seem like you’ve been doing a lot of things but at the same time are messaging her because you’re getting some time off and would like to spend a bit of it with her.
Unless of course you’re supposed to be meeting up with her on said day, and she’s ignoring your texts. If this is the case, then by all means blow up her phone and make sure that she is still planning to hang out with you. If she blows you off then and does not apologize later that day or even the next (give her 24 hours to come up with the greatest sob story and excuse of all time!), then DELETE her number and delete her as a potential lover. She’s not worth your time and energy. Move on to someone else who is.
Could there please be a blog post on how to apply the principles of being feminine and high value to a long term live-in relationship? I love this blog, and it’s helped me so much (thanks Kat!), I just haven’t seen much on this topic and would love to learn more (I also am pretty broke right now, so reading the blog is all I can afford at this time, even though I have bought the book).
I’d recommend not to wait to long to text the first time, either. Generally there is also nothing wrong about picking up the phone and just call! Seriously. We like guys with guts, texting all the time is – sorry – girlish – and this article shows you are over-strained with it 😉 – as first mover you chose your terrain, move where you feel comfortable. Be present, be there, show up, expose, we like to hear your voices.
This last text technique has really worked well in the past for me and for my students. Basically, you want to qualify her and call her out in a funny way for not wanting to hang out with you. You can say something like, “What’s up sweetheart? Are you going to hang out this week, or are you going to keep being a Diddler?” Now, before you laugh and say, what a ridiculous thing to say, hear me out.
You all seem way too needy. It’s okay though, we all get that sometimes. Work on improving yourself first, before you try and bring another person into your life. Sure, easier said than done and we all sometimes crave the opposite sex. it’s natural. But overthinking and over analyzing every little thing you say, or every little thing she/he says is slowly killing your chances. This is hard to overcome, I, myself am still working on it constantly.
They either try to play this super cool guy, who they really aren’t in person, or they’ll say really over-the-top things, really ballsy things, pretending like they’re that kind of guy. In person, they’re as quiet as a mouse and would never dare repeat any of the things they talked about in text messages. Basically, they’ll talk a big game but in no way at all can they even pretend to back it up in person.
I would say that yes, it’s likely normal considering you pointed out that even though she is fluent in English, she isn’t well written. Perhaps she realizes this about herself and texting is a source of insecurity for her. If that is the case, I can assure you that she is spending more time analyzing her OWN behavior and response than she is thinking about how much time has passed since she responded. Secondly, how do you handle it? You don’t. Be patient with her. She’ll respond when she can. If you feel texting is really getting in the way of healthy communication, you do have her phone number and she indeed has a phone – pick it up and call her. A lot easier and much less confusing for everyone involved.

✨With only $99/month you will get mentorship from me and my trained coache...s in the form of daily enlightening posts in which we will also answer your questions every day AND weekly soul nourishments which are weekly classes by me or my trained coaches answering all your most pressing questions about dating, love, men and relationship as well as any life issue you face in general from unique perspectives not available anywhere else. Not to mention surprise appearances/classes, bonuses and discounts for my various programs and events as well as unlimited access to past content (this might change without notice as time progresses) when you become a member.

You all seem way too needy. It’s okay though, we all get that sometimes. Work on improving yourself first, before you try and bring another person into your life. Sure, easier said than done and we all sometimes crave the opposite sex. it’s natural. But overthinking and over analyzing every little thing you say, or every little thing she/he says is slowly killing your chances. This is hard to overcome, I, myself am still working on it constantly.
Start with a warm and simple line that feels good to read. It leaves the conversation open and you’ll be able to know if she’s free to chat too. “Hi”, “Hey, what are you doing?” or even just a smiley face should work perfectly to start a conversation and bring a smile on her face. If she’s busy, she’ll tell you or respond when she has the time. There’s no way you can go wrong with that.
×